#32. Church Full of Kids, but No Kids’ Church
As we think about helping our children into a meaningful relationship with God’s people (see recent articles), we can’t help but stumble into some observations about children’s ministry. It can be hard to imagine something other than what we are used to.
Many churches build elaborate Bible-based kids programs which run during the Sunday service. This is because they value the Bible and children very much. But it’s possible to have the same priorities, yet choose not to go about teaching children in that way. Being in a church which approached children’s ministry differently undermined all my presuppositions about kids in church.
After university in Sydney (and our time at this church), my husband and I moved to a rural town. We didn’t have children yet. We ended up in a church with many children. Friends we had met in Sydney had grown up in this church and we were so impressed with them and the stories they told, that we were keen to know this country church better. We were recruited to help in the church’s summer kids mission, and our bond deepened from there, eventually leading to a couple of years living in that town. Let me shift to present tense, because the church still has the same convictions now as it had nineteen years ago when we first arrived there. In an era of fads, that in itself, is noteworthy.
This church has a lot of families with children, it has an exceptionally vibrant youth group and is working to evangelise the community, and yet they don’t have a children’s program during the formal Sunday service. The hope is that all the kids will participate in what the church does together on Sunday. From the start, I’ve been intrigued to see the kids sitting in for church. There’s the odd noise of young ones being helped, but it doesn’t buzz with restlessness. Kids don’t run around the hall, play up the back, or sit with friends, chatting while the grown ups try to pay attention. On an ordinary Sunday, creche is not a fixture (there is a really great calming room though). In recent years, this church has added a K-4th grade children’s class which runs after the main service time, while the rest of the church has more casual teaching, but it’s in addition to, not instead of, corporate worship. Talk, play and friendships happen in good measure at other times, but there is something special about the service and the kids know it.
This country church is committed to teaching the Bible faithfully and committed to serving the children and youth well (you don’t bother starting a school if you don’t take the Christian formation of children seriously). What’s more, they’ve been doing it for a while. The pastor who was there at the start is still one of the elders who leads and preaches in this church more than forty years later. It’s a very rare case study. This isn’t to say that everyone has loved it. There are people who have chosen to go to a different church because of the situation with children, but of those who persevered, many people say that the commitment to keeping the children in for church (in this particular church) has been one of the most significant factors in discipling their kids. It’s done the rest of the church a whole lot of good too.
In principle, this church so values what happens when believers gather, so trusts the power of the Holy Spirit to apply God’s words to the hearts of his people, works so hard at preaching with vigour (simple without being superficial, clear but compelling), that they don’t want the children to miss out. It’s a church which expects more, but which gives the children into more than we often think children and youth are capable of receiving. This church made me wonder if we underestimate the value of corporate worship; if we underestimate the power of good preaching; and if we underestimate the capacity of our youngest people.
When corporate worship is highly esteemed, we wouldn’t want the kids to miss out on it (I plan to look at our idea of worship in a future article, since this probably has a lot to do with why we’re ok with kids missing it). If we’re confident that the Holy Spirit actually works when his word is preached faithfully, we’ll trust it will be effective for all kinds of people, young and old. If we believe children and youth are capable (and even hungry!) to take hold of things which matter, we wouldn’t feel so pressured to process and package the teaching just for the kids.
Not everyone who grew up in this church are Christians now. God’s grace can’t be manipulated into effect. There is always mystery. But some of the men who oversee and preach in this church now were once kids growing up in it. Many young adults who grew up in this church move to the city for university and work, then move back to this country church when they have kids of their own. When a church has a long track record of doing something different, with better outcomes than usual, it’s worth paying attention. When you’ve got a church where people want to be, which spans decades and generations, the Lord has done something kind. And the means of his kindness are pretty simple.
